Midnight is bad

Everytime. I hit midnight and all my emotions go haywire. 30 minutes ago I was cheerful and dancing around and writing, and now I'm half crying and trying not to wail in despair. What the fuck is wrong with me? First anger, now sadness, what next- fear? I had a good day! Good music, bought a bunchof books, spent time with mum, and has a serious existential discussion with people that are either not there or are totally there... Plus, Irene didn't try to harass John and Sally didn't try to kill Joce. A good day! A good fukken day.And now I'm crying my eyes out and using backspace too much.

...what's wrong with me?

Mad Post

I feel mad.
Angry.
Crazy.
Lost.
Pain.
The emotions I don't want to admit, but I will anyways...
Blood-thirst.
Despair.
Hatred.

Angry: There's a lot of reasons.
Crazy: Why hallo thar things that aren't.... or shouldn't be there.
Lost: See angry.
Pain: I cut my thumb on my sword. My head is pounding. You guys are giving me heart attacks.
Blood-thirst: I don't know why.
Despair: See Angry and Blood-Thirst.
Hatred: Here's the fun one. One that helps with Emotions 1 and 5.
Right now.... I hate almost everyone in varying amounts.
I hate my Team for scaring me and making me stay up all night with worry.
I hate Guess for making me spend hours on riddles.
I hate the majority of Proxies for being evil bastards.
I hate the gods for a lot of things.
I hate my radio for playing music relevant to me.
I hate Slendy for ruining my life.
But worst.... I hate myself.
I hate that I can't control myself.
I hate that I want to kill everyone within a mile radius.
I hate that I rely on a blog to calm myself down and organise my thoughts.
....
I hate that I'm not Shelby Willingham anymore...
I'm not. She was a sweet, innocent kid who liked to doodle and sing silly songs and play with kids and just be normal. Call me Alyx or Justice. They're more me than Shelby was.

Black-Eyed Peas, stop lying. Tonight is not a good night.
I think I'm going to work some more on my script now.
Please, anyone, anyone who wants to actually talk to me, email me. Something. I'm losing my family. Frap's in a badspot, Astrid, Sharpie, and Murphy are dead. I lost all of my friends through a mistake that I wish I cold make up for, but I can't. Now no one trust me...

And....

I can't trust anyone.

New Story?

A DnD based story. either three or four main heroes, I'm thinking about sticking to three. Three works. Ok, so, you have the do-good human Paladin(Eram), the tricky halfling Rogue(Magpie), and- wait, four. Rogue, Paladin, tiefling Warlock(Bree), and elven Ranger(Ferren). They're accompanied by a kobold(Steve), and occasionally a dragonborn Cleric(Axel), and a dwarf Monk(Stonefist(AKA Eric(But only to his friends))). By the by, Magpie and Bree are the only females.

First Script:

Our adventuring company has stopped in the land of Sorrentine. The city is old, filled with crumbling buildings and merchant stalls. Eram and Magpie are arguing again, while Bree is studying some ancient tomes and Ferren is nowhere to be seen. As usual, no one cares.


E: You stole a religious artifact! You must return it-
M: Lest the gods rain torture and fire down on me, yadda yadda! Look, its worth money, and no one was watching. Big whoop.

Eram stutters, his anger blocking words. Bree looks up and sighs.


B: Wow, it must be Tuesday. Look. Magpie, keep the treasure, but return the relic. I'll even give you my share.
E: ....
M: Fine, fine, but only to get Bree's share. Here's your stupid piece of crap.

She tosses a pendant to the Paladin, muttering something about Paladins and laws. Ferren strolls over, looking upset.


B: What now?
M: Someone step on a bug?
F: They're executing a kobold!
....
F: For no reason other than being a kobold!
....


Ferren growls and reaches for his bow.


F: We're saving the kobold, or you get arrows in your heads.

Yo.

Few things to say, today, a few worthwhile things.

1) Got a new sword yesterday. Good sword, best weapon.

2) Cat died yesterday. For no reason. She was young, healthy, all that shiz. But she's dead. Poor Ratz....

3) For all you riddle-lovers, we have a new riddler- Guess. No, really, guys. His name is Guess. Strike hat- he callse them inquiries. Sorry, Guess.

4) I got kinda vicious last night. It was bad.

5) I drew Astrid, Joce, and Sharpie. I'm not going to color a single picture. People keep coming back from the dead too much.

6) ANY OF MY FRIENDS THAT DO NOT HAVE MINECRAFT AND WANT TO PLAY NEED TO SEND ME AN EMAIL K?

7) I got a creeper background. It scares the shit out of me.

8) Yes, I really am changing all my online names to Justice besides my Minecraft account.

Does anyone want to say hi to the voices? Joce and John know that they have minds of their own. Especially Irene. Irene: :D -_-

This Justice ain't blind.

Going MAD!

Not really. ;)

I'm just really hyper. Like, REALLYREALLYREALLY HYPER. I feel bad because of the events of last night. But I'm hyper. I'm dancing around, singing, just... happy. Should I feel guilty about that? Or what? At least Frap doesn't have to be alone, dying, for the rest of his life right?
That's good, right?
Right?
....
HYPER!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgGEezpDU0c
"I'm bloody fuckin' nuts!"

This Justice ain't blind.

Bluh Bluh Grounded

Prolly be on less. Love you guys! Email me if you want.

x.insane.artist.x@gmail.com

Yawn

Never staying up all night again.
NIGHT BEFORE LAST'S POST:
That was the result of paranoia and sleep deprivation.

TO MY PEEPS!
Frap: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
Branwen: ....guess this means no Scott Pilgrim and cocoa....? Are we still friends...?
Joce: /sigh/ Brother.... (No, he isn't my real brother, I just call him that.)
Maze: /also sigh
Janus: I wish I hadn't known about Astrid and Murphy.
Anon: Those dreams are FUCKED UP.
Dreamer: Be safe.
Defender: Keep him safe. DEFEND THE MAN!

I HATE MY SCHOOL. Fukken Christian homeschooling....


Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me.